“Blackboards In Porn” Website Takes Adult Films To School

SFW Porn

October 24, 2017 – If you’re into midget porn, there’s a website for you. If you’re into vegan on meat-lover porn, there’s probably a website for that. And if you get your kicks from analyzing the accuracy of blackboard lessons in teacher-student porn, there is, in fact, a website for you.

On the homepage of “Blackboards in Porn” the blog author states that the site he created is intended to be safe for work. He sums up the purpose of the page by saying:

“Celebrating pornographers who go the extra mile when set dressing classroom porn and actually write something on the blackboard. What do they write, and is it correct?”

On April 1st, 2010, the first post was made focusing on “Compound Angle Formulae” and not the teacher wearing thigh-high stockings.

Though he hasn’t posted since September of 2015, the years in between offered analysis on such high school foes as geography and chemistry to creationism and drivers ed. After a thorough discussion on what is accurate and how well the information is presented, the blogger will issue a grade for each blackboard. They don’t always make the honor roll.

Wired notes the anonymous blogger saying:

“I saw a random picture and was very impressed that in an industry that I would imagine operates on the lowest possible overheads, with minimal production values, someone had actually bothered to take the time to write something on the classroom blackboard. And what they had written was mostly correct. It seemed to open up a new world, where the performers and the people filming had other sides to their lives, and could express themselves and show off things they’d learned and thought they’d never need again. It was like they were saying, ‘Yes, I may make my living as a public fornicator, but I still remember Pythagoras’s Theorem.'”

Take a look at the lessons you may have missed while you were focused on, eh, something else, and for a non-cliff note’s version you can visit Blackboards in Porn.

“It is a promising start that the first thing on this blackboard is SEAT BELT as putting one on is the first thing one should do when getting into a car. Seatbelts have been a major contribution to road safety – they reduce the risk of fatal or serious injury in a collision by as much as 50%. Risk compensation theory, where drivers who feel safer in one way instead take risks in other ways, does muddy the statistics somewhat, but there is no doubt that it is better to wear one. Volvo’s decision to make the patent for their three-point system open and let other car manufacturers copy it for free should be applauded. (Drug companies, please take note.)

In the overtaking manoeuvre diagram, the curved arrows showing the overtaking vehicle’s path show that it approaches dangerously close to car B before swerving sharply into the oncoming lane, possibly even clipping the rear bumper. Such manoeuvres should be planned further in advance, executed more smoothly and not bring vehicles into dangerous proximity with each other.

5/10 Good work on buckling up, but the rest of the ideas need bucking up.”

“This is a frustratingly inconsistent approach to writing chemical formulae. On the one hand the teacher has gone to the trouble of also using structural formulae to improve clarity (eg H₂N₂O₂could be nitramide, but the addition of HO-N=N-OH makes it clear that we are dealing with hyponitrous acid here), but then writes SI (sulphur iodine) instead of Si (silicon) in the formula for orthosilicic acid. This, combined with not using subscripts for many of the numbers, could lead to a great deal of confusion.

Whilst this lesson appears to be aimed at quite a high level, such elementary errors may affect comprehension.

5/10 – rather sloppy.”

“If creationism is to be taught in schools, then it should not be in the science classroom, but as a separate subject of politics of science and religion. And it should certainly be more balanced than simply calling Darwin a crackpot. Charles Darwin is one of the most influential figures in human history, and has the ultimate accolade of appearing on the back of an English banknote. What next: Elizabeth Fry = wally? Boulton and Watt = bozos? Adam Smith = nincompoop? (His name has been appropriated by the Adam Smith Institute, responsible for recommending the privatisation of British Rail and the introduction of the Poll Tax, so maybe the jury should stay out on that one.)

A 5000 word essay by what is presumably this Friday is a tall order, but if God made the world in six days then it should be doable.

0/10 See me.”

“This is clearly an extremely advanced level mathematical course, focusing on the Peano axioms for the natural numbers which formalised mathematics in the late 19th century. This course would culminate with Gödel’s second incompleteness theorem which shows that the consitency of the Peano axioms cannot be formalised within Peano arithmetic itself.

Alternatively, it could be that the pupil, even at her advanced age, hasn’t grasped that 1 + 1 = 2, and that all the after school one-to-one lessons in the world aren’t going to work. Indeed, she probably won’t even understand what ‘one-to-one’ means.

8/10 – loses two marks for ‘math’.”

“Nowadays, the use of spell-checkers is widespread, but even these won’t catch every error and students should learn that a CV containing a spelling mistake will often be consigned straight to the bin. It is worrying that Professor Gunn has made it this far in education and one can only be more concerned about the literacy levels of his superiors. Professor Gunn has no excuse for not brushing up on such basics as he only appears to work for three hours a week. Hopefully the test on Friday will involve actually using punctuation, and sentence structures that are more complex than
PUTTING
EVERY
WORD
IN
CAPITALS
ON
A
NEW
LINE.

3/10 Could do bettar.”

“These are some good examples of operations with surds, using the rules for both multiplication (ⁿ√(a.b) = ⁿ√a.ⁿ√b) and division (ⁿ√(a/b) = ⁿ√a/ⁿ√b). All the working is correct. The sloppy square root sign in the second example extending over the equals sign could be confusing, and handwriting in general isn’t great, but is legible.

8/10 – Good work, though loses a mark for ‘math’. And remember that sticks and stones may break your bones, but being called Dr Vagina every day of your working life will never hurt you. Though it may cause a career-ending nervous breakdown.”

What do you think of “Blackboards in Porn?” Will you look at them differently moving forward?