Jesus Quotes the Candidates on Jimmy Kimmel (VIDEO)

Jesus Quotes the Candidates on Jimmy Kimmel

February 4, 2016 – This week Jimmy Kimmel addressed religion in politics, noting on his Kimmel Live that “God is a very important part of this election” with almost all of the candidates going out of their way to “talk about the Bible and their faith.” In setting up the sketch that follows, Kimmel said :

“So we thought it would be interesting to take real quotes from the primary candidates—these are things these guys actually said—and we wanted to get an idea of what they would sound like from the mouth of Jesus.”

Cue Jesus courtesy of ABC:

USA TODAY did the homework – here’s a rundown of quotes mentioned in the video:

“You don’t lock your doors because you hate people on the outside. You lock the doors because you love the people on the inside.” 

Who said it: Marco Rubio, Roman Catholic
When and where: Dec. 30, 2015, in Newton, Iowa

“We need appropriate vetting, and I don’t think orphans under 5 are being — you know, you should be admitted into the United States at this point.”

Who said it: Chris Christie, Roman Catholic
When and where: Nov. 15, 2015, on the Hugh Hewitt Show

“You don’t stop bad guys by taking our guns. You stop bad guys by using our guns.”

Who said it: Ted Cruz, Southern Baptist
When and where: Dec. 4, 2015, in Johnston, Iowa

“Look at (Carly Fiorina’s) face! Would anyone vote for that?”

Who said it: Donald Trump, Presbyterian
When and where: In a Sept. 9, 2015, article in Rolling Stone

“I would bomb the s— out of them.” 

Who said it: Donald Trump, Presbyterian
When and where: Nov. 12, 2015, in Fort Dodge, Iowa

“When you get these terrorists, you have to take out their families!”

Who said it: Donald Trump, Presbyterian
When and where: Dec. 2, 2015, on Fox News

“I’ll take the votes of everyone who likes machine guns and bacon.”

Who said it: Ted Cruz, Southern Baptist
When and where: Aug. 31, 2015, in Milford, N.H.

I will build a wall. It will be a great wall.” 

Who said it: Donald Trump, Presbyterian
When and where: Dec. 15, 2015, in Las Vegas

Clearly Kimmel’s intent was to juxtapose the traditional teachings of Jesus with the political rhetoric of the self-avowed Christian candidates.

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