‘The Loin King’ Porn Parody Premieres Alongside ‘Lion King’ Remake
- Funny
- Offensive
“They’re about to li-on each other”
July 18th, 2019 – Gird your loins: there’s a Lion King porn parody, and it’s coming for you. As fans ready themselves for a remake of the 90s classic, they can whet their appetite with The Loin King — but maybe just don’t sing “Can You Fill My Muff Tonight” in front of the kids.
The porn parody, created by WoodRocket and available on Pornhub, actually gives audiences a more “live-action” vibe than Disney’s highly anticipated version. Men and women dressed in animal costumes make their way through the circle (jerk) of life singing and dancing to pun-filled classics.
And, of course, Elton John makes an appearance only this time he goes by the name “Elton Dong.”
Porn may not normally get five stars for plot, but the synopsis for The Loin King lays out a fairly familiar storyline.
“Sinba and Na-Na are ready to mate, but his evil uncle Screw sends his daddy to his death via a Wildebreast stampede. Now with the help of his two friends, Tibone and Poonbaa, will Sinba get back to feeling the love tonight? Find out in The Loin King.“
The two-minute trailer gives a window into the lives of the horny wildlife. Feel free to watch the trailer in front of your co-workers since body parts are censored with the word “BOOBS.” Just be ready for supervisor side-eye when you start singing along to “hot cum on my ta-tas” in exchange for “Hakuna Matata.”
Other re-worked hits include “I Just Can’t Wait to Be Fuc-King,” “The Circle Jerk of Life,” and “Madagascrew.” Hans Zimmer will just have to deal with a lot of sexually-charged euphemisms as well as some anatomically-charged direct lines.
“Gonna send your vag a package / Amazon just said it shipped / It’s going in your vagina / That package is my dick,” one randy lion sings.
An extended version is available on Pornhub Premium. And, sure, the trailer lets you know that it includes “MORE SEX.” If you’d rather hear Beyonce and Donald Glover sing, The Lion King opens in theaters Friday. FYI, there will be way LESS SEX.